Tuesday, March 14, 2017

[Fan Requested] Hot Cereal on a Cold Day

90's Kids Only!


So a while back, my friend Grant requested that I eat Quaker Oats Dinosaur Egg oatmeal, and today my other friend Dani requested that I eat oatmeal because of this weather. So today, I'm fulfilling both of those requests and eating Dinosaur Egg oatmeal!


So if you're like me, you had no idea this kind of oatmeal still existed. I haven't had this stuff since I was like maybe ten years old. When was the last time you guys had this stuff? Like, comment and subscribe to let me know. 

Also, check out this super swaggy fan-art Dani made me!


I freakin love it! For those of you who don't know me in real life, this is the closest you'll get to a face reveal for now.

Anyway, let's eat some poor defenseless baby dinosaurs that haven't even seen the light of day yet! 



Dinosaur eggs taste an awful lot like brown sugar. Pretty good though. I actually ate so much oatmeal in a month one time, that I had too much iron in my diet. Crazy, right? I'm gonna give this one a solid 8/10. 

If you have any other suggestions for me to eat on this blog, comment them somewhere below, or just know me in real life and reach me the way you normally do.

Join me next time on the blog, where I jump off the Trump Tower. 

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

[National Cereal Day 2017] Finding Dory

What is up, buoys and gills?

Today is National Cereal Day!
Unfortunately, I don't have anything quite as cool as last year's National Cereal Day planned this year, but I figure as long as I post something, maybe the Cereal Gods will let me live for yet another year.

One cool thing that I did to celebrate National Cereal Day that you may've already noticed, I updated the banner!


Yep. It's a straight-up Kellogg's rip-off.
I don't really consider myself "well versed" in the graphic design world, but I think it turned out pretty well. Much better than that shitty clip art spoon shit I was using before. In my opinion at least.

If you're a new to reading these, or you just stumbled onto this blog from the wilderness, you can find last years NCD blog HERE!
 And for the lazy, here's a quick video from it:



Anyway, let's get on with the actual blog, eh? 

Today I present to you Finding Dory cereal! Don't get too excited though, it's just Lucky Charms with fish marshmallows. I dunno why, but Jodi loves buying me Lucky Charms rip-offs for this blog. I think she just wants the vegetarian gods to smite me for eating marshmallows. Ah, well. Fuck it, right?



This box sparkly af, fam. I had to take multiple photos of this box just to try and get the glare to not be so obnoxious. This was the best I could do, so deal with it. 
So, you get marshmallows shaped like Dory, of course, Marlin/Nemo, ... Yellow Fish, and White Fish? Alright. You guys could't be arsed to try and make the octopus guy (Hank) or Sigourney Weaver? Shit. Now I just wanna see a Sigourney Weaver shaped marshmallow...


Let's pack that bowl, homie.




 So, I recently watched Finding Dory on Netflix. I wanted to watch it before I made this post because I figured it would give me something to talk about, so here comes that part.

I thought the movie was pretty good, honestly. One of the (usually unwanted) effects of seeing a popular movie quite a few months after its release is that you hear a lot of good and bad things about the movie before you even see it, which can weigh your opinion one way or another while watching it. For instance, I heard quite a few people say that Finding Dory was a complete cookie-cutter of the first film. So when I first started the movie, I was fully expecting Beverly Hills Cop 2 amounts of cookie-cuttery, which wasn't the case, at least in my opinion. Sure, they used a lot of the same secondary characters, but I feel like they introduced enough new characters to keep it fresh. I also feel like the plot and setting were different enough as well. I mean, it's a movie for kids whatthefuckever, right?

Anyway, that's just like, my opinion, man. I'm by no means a movie critic. Honestly, I'm hardly even a cereal critic.  Speaking of which, I'm not even giving this a rating, it's Lucky Charms with the Disney Skin DLC pack.

Tune in next time when I bash a penguin's head in with a rock and eat it's brains.

Chad Zilch: Lost in Antarctica